Marriage and Other Tomfoolery

This is a facebook note/blog reposting... lame, but this one is for my mom's sake... She reads my blog, but doesn't have a facebook. You don't have to read it twice unless you want to. =]
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I sit here listening to my summer soundtrack on yet another lonely night, but tonight something is different. I don’t feel the sting of solitude, I’m not reduced to tears by the empty silence, and I finally possess a contented spirit in singleness. This night has been long awaited.

Maybe someday I’ll have someone to share my deepest, innermost thoughts with on an intimate level, but maybe not. I’m okay either way. For the first time in a very long time, I don’t feel like less because I don’t have someone. All of a sudden it cannot be clearer to me that God made me exactly how He wanted. I have a beautiful heart, I am precious, I HAVE SOMETHING TO OFFER, and my purpose is to use what God has given me in order to more effectively serve Him… with or without someone by my side. Marriage is not my PURPOSE in life and I’m not worse off if it never happens for me.

The apostle Paul often talks about marriage in his letters. To paraphrase, he says that if you can serve God better as a single person, do it. Even though it’s much more difficult to get a grasp on, if you can serve God more effectively as a couple with someone else, do it. I think Paul had a point there. He never married… The way I see it, marriage is a multifaceted experience. On one hand, it is what Paul said: an opportunity to serve, worship, and love God better because of this other person. On another hand, I believe it’s an expression of God’s love for us manifest in a physical way. A beautiful gift designed to let us be in communion with our spouse and with God in the most pure and intimate way. On another hand completely, marriage is a perpetuation, a contributor to life. I know that seems like such common sense but it was stated so plainly in a conversation with two of my dear friends a while ago… Once you get married, that one person is your FAMILY. Often, I think of a future family and picture a husband and a few children, but as soon as “You may now kiss the bride” is uttered, a family is created. Crazy, isn’t it? Of course you still have moms and dads, brothers and sisters, but things are altered irrevocably as soon as those finalizing words are spoken. Family is redefined.

Frankly, I would prefer to think that I’ll be married someday, but I won’t live by that dream. James Dean said, “Dream as if you’ll live forever, live as if you’ll die tomorrow.” I say, “Dream as if you’ll be married someday, live as if you never will be.” It’s time to refocus and put God at the core and center with no distractions. Building friendships with no hidden agendas or ulterior motives is going to be a driving factor. Weaving a web of Christian support to be there if that spouse never comes, or even if he does, will be of utmost importance.

As this contentedness sinks in further and I become more and more accustomed to feeling worthy of love, I pray that every one of my friends has this same assurance, single or not. Each of you is important and has something special to offer. This story God is writing, everyday life, would not be complete without YOU, that’s why you are here. You have a very important role here and whether that role is to be filled alone with a church of Christian brothers and sisters around you, or in a marriage (haha but also with a net of Christian support of course), is for you and God to talk about.

Plus think of this: if you are wholly satisfied, truly joyful, and complete with it being just you and Jesus, imagine the overflow of happiness and gratefulness you would feel if you were blessed to have a spouse someday! w00t.

No matter what, God's plan is always better even if it's difficult to see. :)

Semi-Charmed Life

That's right, I'm referencing probably the most catchy, worst content-filled, amazing and horrible song by the awesome band Third Eye Blind. I'm not saying that my life is all about doing Crystal Meth because I've never done a single drug in my life... wait... that was a lie. I was on 'roids once but they were prescribed. I almost died from poison ivy. haha that's a little known fact about me.

ANYway, I digress. My point for this post is that, to quote the song, "I want something else to get me through this." I've realized lately that my priorities are massively screwed up. I'm pursuing a lot of things before I'm pursuing God. Boo that. I don't want to have any idols... NOTHING is better than the whole-hearted pursuit of God and I don't know how I forgot that.

All I'm saying is, it's time to get my heart back in line and begin where I left off. It's all about God, it's all for Him. Refocusing time.

"He must INCREASE, but I must DECREASE."
-John 3:30



Ummm... this is a hilarious remixed clip from old school DBZ. Again from Travis... He's full of youtube GOLD! =] I hope you like it!

The Best Thing in Life

Love is the best thing in life. No, I'm not talking about romantic love though I've heard good things. I mean all the OTHER types of love.
Friendship
Sibling
Parent/Child
Roommates
Colleague (come on, you love the people you work with)

You know what I mean, the type of love where there is a mutual respect and admiration. The persistent, unconditional love that speaks volumes about relationships. The past few days I feel like I have been inundated with love. The first incident occurred this past Sunday when I got to see my roommate and one of our friends from school for a few hours. That was awesome. I love my roommate like you don't even know. The next incident was more like a series of incidents... My mom and I have been spending a lot of quality time together lately making dinner and watching movies and even just talking for hours. That really makes me feel like I'm worth it, ya know? The most recent of all the love-filled events occurred today when one of my best friends came alllllll the way down to butt-hole EP to visit me and have lunch. What an amazing day it was. That made me so freaking happy!

Honestly, there is NOTHING better than quality time and good conversation to make a girl feel loved.



Favorite of the day: "Hot Air Balloon" by Owl City. Owl City has a new CD coming out soon and you can score great quality free downloads of the new songs by going to the website and signing up for his newsletter. Seriously sweet deal. Enjoy my new favorite!!! =]

Puncture Wounds and Wounds of Other Varieties.

Pretzels. They can make you bleed. No lie. I was crushing pretzels to make some strawberry pretzel dessert and my right hand was all cut up. I may have bled into the pretzels. Oops. Let's hope I didn't. Stupid sharp salt.

I sometimes wonder, okay always wonder, what people think when they see me. Is it a happy kind of excited feeling or an, "oh crap, there she is again" type of thing... are people indifferent when I'm around? Just some thoughts.

I also tend to wonder if I've ever been a mistake. Try to follow me on this one... I have had crushes before where I look back on them and think to myself, "WHAT was I thinking?! That was so weird and such a waste of time!" I wonder if anyone has ever felt that way about me. Probably not, I only know of two people that have ever legitimately had crushes on me... I guess that kinda solves that problem.

I wish I knew how to play the drums. That would be sweet.

My grandma drove an hour to my house today just to take me out to a surprise lunch. I had already eaten. FML. I still went and it was really fun. I love my grandma.

I made my summer soundtrack today. :) On itunes I always put together a playlist that gets me through the summer. This year's is glorious. 316 songs full of pure deliciousness.

89 days until I go back to Malone.



Courtesy of my friend Travis, Onion News Network's report of the newest in RPGs: World of World of Warcraft. Hahahaha this is so funny.

i hate men

most guys belong to a huge bunch of douche-magooshes. not all, but the majority. at least my two closest guy friends from home are. that's all i have to say about that. BAH!

Melt the Sugar

So I felt compelled to blog even though i had absolutely, positively nothing to say. I would try a stream of consciousness-type post but I know that
A) my fingers won't type fast enough and
B) it would drone on forever because I tend to not know where to stop with those things.
Anywho, the post title comes from the song that's been stuck in my head for days... it's the favorite of the day. Huzzah!


This isn't the legit music video... I don't know if there IS one. "Melt the Sugar" by The Summer Obsession. Have fun with that.

One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

Something I don't understand about myself is how I can be making so much progress and have my heart set in exactly the right place for growth then all of a sudden totally slip back into old habits. Ugh, I HATE that.

My past few days have been BEYOND amazing! God has been revealing himself to me in a ton of really cool ways and I've been in the best of moods because I know for certain I'm living in God's will right now. But then, just like that, I made a poor choice that I know didn't make God smile at all and I feel so unworthy all over again. GAH! It's intensely frustrating!!!

I prayed about it and I just told God that I don't even understand myself... I swear, Romans 7 is like my life. I don't understand the things that I do, I do the very thing that I hate and I don't do the things that I want to do! STUPID FLESH! I know that God loves me despite my screw ups and I know that He'll always take me back; for that I am eternally, unspeakably grateful. It's just self-sabotage, Satan doesn't want me making any kind of progress in my relationship with God and will have me do anything to get knocked back a few notches. I'm sick of letting him win those battles!!!!!!!

Oh goodness, I need prayer.


Well today's lovely video is called "Start Wearing Purple" by Gogol Bordello. Seriously, look into this band, they are amazing.
I also realized that I didn't include a video on the last post, soooo here's one! It's darn funny.

Revelation

I write too much about how I'm feeling about things and not enough about the absolute, un-changing, steadfast things- or rather, thing- in life. God is 100% absolute always, never changes, and is infinity times more dependable than the feelings and whims of man.

Okay so, God goes by SOOOOO many different names in Scripture and that has totally been blowing my mind lately. I learned some of these in my ninth grade Bible class but I don't think I really understood how awesome this is until now. See, God has all these different characteristics and in the Bible when people were talking about God, they would reference Him as the one with the particular characteristic that they needed... Just take a look and see what I mean. When I read through this, I'm not even gonna lie, I cried a little bit because God is just so dang big and amazing. :)
(all the info here came from this website: http://ldolphin.org/Names.html)

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Old Testament (The Hebrew Scriptures, or Tanach)

EL: God ("mighty, strong, prominent") used 250 times in the OT
ELOHIM: God (a plural noun, more than two, used with singular verbs); Elohim occurs 2,570 times in the OT
EL SHADDAI: God Almighty or "God All Sufficient." 48 times in the OT
ADONAI: Lord in our English Bibles, "Master'' or "Lord" 300 times in the OT
JEHOVAH: LORD in our English Bibles (all capitals).
Yahweh is the covenant name of God. Occurs 6823 times in the OT, "The Self-Existent One," "I AM WHO I AM" or 'I WILL BE WHO I WILL BE" as revealed to Moses at the burning bush
JEHOVAH-JIREH: "The Lord will Provide." God always provides, adequate when the times come.
JEHOVAH-ROPHE: "The Lord Who Heals", God heals body, soul and spirit; all levels of man's being.
JEHOVAH-NISSI: "The Lord Our Banner." Ex. 17:15. God on the battlefield, from word which means "to glisten," "to lift up," See Psalm 4:6.
JEHOVAH-M'KADDESH: "The Lord Who Sanctifies"
JEHOVAH-SHALOM: "The Lord Our Peace" Judges 6:24. "Shalom" translated "peace" 170 times means "whole," "finished," "fulfilled," "perfected." Related to "well," welfare." Deut. 27:6; Dan. 5:26; I Kings 9:25 8:61; Gen. 15:16; Ex. 21:34, 22:5, 6; Lev. 7:11-21. Shalom means that kind of peace that results from being a whole person in right relationship to God and to one's fellow man.
SHEPHERD
JUDGE
JEHOVAH ELOHIM: "LORD God"
JEHOVAH-TSIDKENU: "The Lord Our Righteousness"
JEHOVAH-ROHI: "The Lord Our Shepherd"
JEHOVAH-SHAMMAH: "The Lord is There"
JEHOVAH-SABAOTH: "The Lord of Hosts" The commander of the angelic host and the armies of God.
EL ELYON: 'Most High"
ABHIR: 'Mighty One', ("to be strong")
BRANCH
KADOSH: "Holy One"
SHAPHAT: "Judge"
EL ROI: "God of Seeing" Hagar in Gen. 16:13. The God Who opens our eyes.
KANNA: "Jealous" (zealous). Ex. 20:5, 34:14; Deut. 5:9; Isa. 9:7; Zech. 1:14, 8:2.
PALET: "Deliverer"
YESHUA: "Savior"
GAOL: "Redeemer" (to buy back by paying a price).
MAGEN: "Shield"
STONE
EYALUTH: "Strength"
TSADDIQ: "Righteous One"
EL-OLAM: "Everlasting God"
EL-BERITH: "God of the Covenant"
EL-GIBHOR: Mighty God
ZUR: "God our Rock"
Malachi calls Messiah "The Sun of Righteousness" (Malachi 4:2).
Isaiah calls Messiah "Wonderful, Counselor, Mighty God (El Gibhor), Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace" (Isa. 9:6).
'Attiq Yomin (Aramaic): "Ancient of Days,"
MELEKH: "King"
"The Angel of the Lord: " Gen. 16:7ff, 21:17, 22:11, 15ff, 18:1-19:1, 24:7, 40, 31:11-13, 32:24-30; Ex. 3:6, 13:21, Ezek. 1:10-13. Seen in the theophanies, or pre-incarnate appearances of the Son of God in the OT (See I Cor. 10:3 NT).
FATHER

THE FIRST AND LAST

New Testament Scriptures (Greek):

KURIOS: "Lord" Found some 600 times in the NT.
DESPOTES: "Lord" 5 times: Lu. 2:29; Acts 4:24; 2 Pet. 2:1; Jude 4; Rev. 6:10.
THEOS: "God" (equivalent to the Hebrew Elohim), 1,000 times in the NT. In the NT all the persons of the trinity are called "God" at one time or another.
I AM: Jesus upset his generation especially when He said, "Before Abraham was, I AM," John 8:58. Note also his claim to be Jehovah in such phrases as "I AM the Light of the world," "the bread of life," living water," "the Resurrection and the Life," "the Way, Truth and the Life" in John's Gospel. From the Hebrew OT verb "to be" signifying a Living, Intelligent, Personal Being.
THEOTES: "Godhead"

HUPSISTOS: "Highest"

SOTER: "Savior"

WORD: (logos)

ALMIGHTY: (pantokrator)

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Seriously. Whoa. God is so cool.

Bliss and Remorse

Happy things have been happening lately. I love the communication that I've had with people so far this summer, I mean, technology has proven to be a valuable tool thus far... Facebook, texting, all this has made catching up easy. There's more here, but I don't really want to go into too much detail. Essentially, I'm a happy camper right now. Yay for that.

I will say though, that I feel phased out of my friends' lives lately. Lame and stupid, I know. It's just because I never actually get to see anyone, ya know? I'm sure a ton of people are feeling this to a point, but it's just so crappy. I wish that I lived closer to my friends. ANY of my friends. I love seeing my Heartland friends when I go to the school with my mom, but I don't want to seem too much like that lame-o graduate who never leaves and who never realizes that she's HAD her time at HCS. Ah well, that's where I stand for now.



Okay, here's the END OF ZE WORLD!!! So funny, a little bit profane, but SO funny.

Summer

Sleep.
Star Trek.
Sleep.
School with Mom.
Clean the House.
Sleep.
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.
Sleep.
Malone.

That is the strict itinerary that I'll be following this summer. It's going to be a smokin' time. I mean, okay. Lately some of my friends' notes on facebook have gotten me to really think about the summer and how I was once so filled with excitement and anticipation at the mystery of what the summer would hold that I would only be let down at the start up of school because my summer magic never happened. Maybe if i keep a cynical enough attitude from the get go, I'll less disappointed at the end.

No lie, all I ever wanted was a summer of adventure and of real life magic. It never happened. I just wanted to be able to look my summer memories in the face and say, "I'm not surprised that happened; it's summer and anything can happen." I never got the chance to say that. I want a big, magical summer and I want to feel like I never want it to end. Maybe this is too much to ask, maybe I'm being selfish, but maybe this is the summer that it's supposed to happen...

I had one summer night once that I never wanted to end. I was about nine and my family was camping, not just my immediate, but also some of my extended family. One hot night, it was too muggy for any of us to sleep so we went to the playground on the campgrounds and me, my big brother, my four cousins, my two aunts, my uncle, and my parents played a game of flashlight tag that I never ever wanted to end. I think that might still be the best night of my life. I remember it so vividly. This was a perfect night. It was before the lost innocence of my cousins, before divorces riddled my family, before depression, slipped discs, and surgeries prevented the adults from running around like kids. It was before drugs, alcohol, self-centeredness and bitterness tainted our family. I wish I could return to that night sometimes, but I know there's a time for facing reality and a time for growing up.

The All-Nighter that Made All the Difference

Kelly and I were super irresponsible on Wednesday; we both had papers to write, she was mondo upset about some news, and I was just in a bad place mentally. Now with all this in mind, we decided that a roadtrip to East Palestine, my hometown, was in order. Definitely NOT the smartest thing we've ever done.

After we went to my house with John and Paul to get a bathing suit, a sleeping bag, a spatula, and some glue (haha nice combo, i know), reality set in that we HAD to do these papers. We swung by McD's to get some iced coffees and set ourselves up to camp out in Myers Lounge until our papers were done... Essentially, it was pointless to even try for sleep since we both needed to be awake in 5 hours for different commitments so we decided to just go for the classic, stereotypical, college freshman all-nighter.

We ended up having to make yet another coffee run, but we pulled through in the end and got our papers done, fairly well, too! Man, it was a sweet victory. We didn't make excuses, we didn't justify not doing them, we really just pulled through it and GOT R DONE. As the sun rose, we felt compelled to go out into the quad and just pray... the sky was SO beautiful. God is so good, guys. I mean, wow, the lyrics from "Trading My Sorrows" sparked some discussion: "Though the sorrow may last for the night, His joy comes with the morning." Seriously? This is so deep if you think about it. Things from one day are not supposed to affect the joy that we have in the Lord at the beginning of every new day! God doesn't want us to worry, we are supposed to have no fear, we're supposed to make every day a joyful one, FILLED with praise, unto the Lord!!! That's so BIG!

After this revelation happened, and after I discussed it with God, it seemed like I was being called to be more effective for the Kingdom of God every day. No more lukewarm living! My goal is to help people see that each day starts off beautifully, and FULL of true JOY, and that it's our job to see that and like my friend Corey eloquently stated, "shout praises to God at the top of our lungs from the very highest place we can get!"


It seems most appropriate to include "Trading My Sorrows" since it is, after all, what sparked the revolution in my soul! Also, I feel that I should add a disclaimer saying that there are some underlying messages of the song that I don't agree with, but the aforementioned line really means the world to me right now.

Plus, as a special treat, here's the link to Kelly's blog post about this same night! Follow her if you wish, Kubiak's Corner of the Internet is always entertaining!

I'll Take This with a Grain of Sand

Yes, sand, not salt. Wednesday in astronomy lab, we counted grains of sand for some reason or another... I really just don't know. It was the second worst lab after the one where we colored a pixelated picture of a calico cat. Yeah. Now, even though the lab was ridiculous, it provided some valuable bonding time with members of my class to whom I seldom talk. This may sound lame, but I really do treasure opportunities like that. Building relationships, getting to know people, and bonding over common ground are some of my favorite things ever. I simply love fellowshipping and that lab gave me a great opportunity to do that... even if it was pointless for my education.


The song "She's So High" by Tal Bachman has been stuck in my head for the past few days... Enjoy it! =]

Bonding With Miss Bonicky

So there's this totally rad girl that I'm friends with... her name is Elle Bonicky and today we did some marathon epic bonding. We were both working on our prayer journals for our prayer person from our Mountain Dew Thursday Bible Study and we talked and talked about sooooooo many things it was unreal. I mean, our brainstorming, web-surfing, cutting, coloring, journal time was so awesome! I'm really glad that we got to know each other better and that we both made a ton of progress on our prayer journals. I'm very thankful for her right now, haha especially after how I was feeling this afternoon as you can tell from the previous post. I LOVE YOU, ELLE!



Fave of the day: The genius work of Flight of the Conchords, "Most Beautiful Girl In the Room". So good.

Life or Something Like It.

It's rough out there, guys. Each day brings with it a new set of trials, a new batch of problems. I think that right now in my life, the major battle is dealing with the concept of battles. I feel like I'm being pulled under in a sea of battles. Relentless. Cold. Drowning. Alone.

Hmmm, emo much? My bad. Hopefully cheerful next time.

i hate this speech with a burning passion

ANYTHING. give me ANYTHING to stall from doing this God-forsaken speech. right now i choose blogging as a worthy distraction. see, i have to give this speech tomorrow and for me actually giving it isn't the problem... it's writing it that is the hardship.

fact: it's a persuasive speech so i have to be, well, persuasive

fact: my professor gave us the most intricate, detailed, and painful outline format possible

fact: we need to cite at least 7 sources (including one journal article) in our speeches

fact: it's an 8-10 minute long deal

fact: i'm passionate about my topic, persuading my classmates to help out St. Jude Children's
Research Hospital any way they can

myth: my HOURS of trying to write this speech have been productive

BAHHHHHHH! i can't even take it! i think i have like, two paragraphs total typed out so far. i'm really stressed out about it and i can't focus at all... maybe i could take some of my roommate's Concerta to help me out with that.

something else that hasn't been helping is my reminiscing about this past weekend which was possibly either the best or the second best i've had since coming to school. let's just say: road trip. =] but seriously, there's also this kid... oh jeez. he's been on my mind a lot lately too which is kinda rough because there's more important things to focus on here like this dang speech for example!

just kill me now... please.


hey look, a random Five Iron Frenzy song.

A Change of Season.

Plans fall to pieces a lot and I learned that tonight in a lot of ways. The first time it happened was at room draw, the second was when something else really weird happened.

The ideal was for four of us to be suite-mates next year in the New Residence Building... Things got ALL kinds of crazy, and it was established that we'd leave it in God's hands how everything worked out. His plans are basically always better anyway. So what had happened was, I drew #1. That's right, I got to pick my room first. SCORE! Ricki and I got a flippin' sweet room and we were expecting everything to work according to our agenda; God however, had something else in mind...

We are on the same floor as Kelly and Amanda, but we're not suite-mates. Our suite-mates are these two awesome girls names Lauren and Jordan. It's NOT what I expected, but I am SO confident that it's going to work out in a great way. God is so good and faithful even when we can't begin to fathom His plans or the way He's working. I'm so pumped for this change of school year, residence, and lifestyle.

I'm not going to talk much about the other way that I saw plans falling to pieces today, but i WILL say that it kept me thinking about Ecclesiastes 3. Here's the King James Version:

Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8
To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

It's been a recurring theme in my life lately that times are a-changin' and that it's perfectly naturally and in God's order for them to change.The season is changing both literally and figuratively... both are changing into something more warm and beautiful than before. Thank you, Jesus!

A Change of Pace.

Things need to be different. A rescheduling has to happen and has to happen soon. There's a tiny bit more than a month left of this school year and there isn't much time to change things, but I know it can happen. More time with God, more time with schoolwork, more time building relationships, less time with my mafia, and less time with my freak-outs. These last few weeks of school are going to be crucial... I want to be held accountable. PLEASE help me if you think about it! A change is what's needed.

A Change of Clothes.

I'm finally done with wearing that stupid, annoying pink button-down. I'm NOT hand washing my outfit anymore. I can do my hair and makeup again and I can wear jewelry! But yet, strangely I'll miss the sameness of this past week. I'll miss not worrying about how I look and I'll miss pretty much telling the world, "take me or leave me, here I am with the bare minimum".

After our Mt. Dew Thursday Bible study decided that wearing one outfit for the week would be a sweet way to see how much excess we live in, we were almost all on board for the challenge. I was determined to make the absolute most of this week... like I said, no done hair, no makeup, hand washing the outfit, even my shower shoes were sacrificed because they weren't the one pair that I chose for the week. I really wanted this to be an intense week of constant reminders that I am blessed beyond reason and that I have almost a responsibility to do everything I can to bless others in the name of God.

Now that I blow dried my hair, put lotion on, and am wearing a new set of PJs it all feels like... too much. I'm so thankful for all the choices that I have, but it feels like a waste to have so many choices. Overkill. I don't know, this is a hard thing to explain. I'll stop.

Sucking at Blogging

A lot of stuff has been going on lately... lots of decisions to be made, lots of changes taking place, and lots of faith being challenged.

In a nutshell, two of my closest friends here at Malone might be leaving after this semester is over (which would totally crush me). I've been praying like crazy for them... I just want God's will to be revealed to them and that no matter what it is, they'll have a peace about whatever God is telling them. I've also been praying that the rest of our friends, including myself, will have peace about whatever it is they are supposed to do.

I dunno, this makes me want to watch Facing the Giants really bad though. If you haven't seen it, go watch it. In fact, I'll include a clip or two from it today.



Super inspiring Death Crawl scene
My new life theory in a movie scene. Prepare for Rain!!!

Back Where I Belong

After a truly great break with my friends from Heartland, my 2 long lost friends from Liberty University in Virginia, and my new friends Justin, Ben, Owen, and best friend Blake, I'm back at Malone... I am on cloud nine. 'Nuff said for today.



Happy times in our youth, courtesy of Jessica (one of the two Liberty friends). We're both Boy Meets World junkies and this is a nice montage of clips from that show. Yay! =]

It's been far too long with far too little to say...

Okay, I'll admit, the title is a lie. There has been so much to say that I've been too overwhelmed by the sheer magnitude of it all that I have not been able to nor will I ever blog bout the incidents that have occurred in the past week or so. I figure that the post would be much longer than any one human could sit and read. I already have pushed that envelope far enough in the past. SO! I have a short blog today comprised of just a few key things that have happened recently.

1. I got hit in the face with a basketball yesterday. It sucked.
2. I finally git the T Bell that I've been craving. (A cheesy double-beef burrito.)
3. My 9:30 class is canceled for tomorrow!
4. My circle of friends is mystically increasing exponentially!!!
5. I SAW DAN TODAY!!!!!!!! (http://danseveryday.blogspot.com/)

That's it for now!

Favorite:
A clip of "Brule's Rules for Your Health" from the comedy sketch show "The Tim and Eric Awesome Show". (Courtesy of Dr. Shawn Floyd, my philosophy professor.)

Aww Crap.

It happened again. I know there was something significant to blog about but I really can't remember what it was... Shoot. Give me a sec....

OH YEAH! Okay so this week was so BIPOLAR it hurt. Sunday, awesome day of hanging out and merriment. Intramurals out the wazoo were going on Sunday and we all know how much I live for those basketball games. So after the games were over, Ricki, Amanda, Brandon, and I went to McDonald's for some sustenance (before I continue, you should know that Ricki was driving a Mustang) and on the way there some putzy kids in the lane next to us revved their engine while we were at a stop light... The most epic street race ever ensued and even though it was AWESOME to SMOKE those clowns, we were right in the flipping middle of Canton. In retrospect it probably wasn't the brightest idea ever, but it was so much fun.

We got our food and headed back to campus to sit by the lit fireplace in the lounge of the girls' dorms and eat & fellowship. After a bit, Amanda left and John and Kelly came over to hang with us until midnight when the guys get kicked out. It was so fun having that time with all of them... I know it sounds so lame probably, but I really do cherish any quality time that I get to spend with my friends when we aren't stressed about classes, work, "Frickin Rachel," the upcoming track meet, or clinicals. So anyway, when 12 rolled around we all were like, "This is gay. We still want to hang out." So to remedy this situation, we hit up The Barn which is open until 4am for everyone. (Our friend Steve had his hammock strung up in the Barn... it was really fun to play around on. This has nothing to do with the rest of the story, it's just a fun fact.)

For you non-Maloners, there's this breed of people we like to refer to as "The Barneys." They are the ones who are ALWAYS at the barn, doing homework, hanging out, eating, sleeping, whatever... They leave at 4 when it closes and come back two hours later when it re-opens; they just love the barn. (*cough* Aaron Zorn *cough*) We wereshocked when we went to the Barn that Sunday evening that the regular Barney crowd wasn't there!!! After a mere hour and a half, Kelly, Ricki, Brandon, and I were the ONLY FOUR people in there! Seriously, guys, this DOESN'T happen. Man, we were living it up, too. Ricki and me were running around like crazy people and being so stupid. She jumped off the balcony to the main floor... Terrifying but awesome. At about 3 ish we started playing this game called MFK. (Thank you Brandon!) The game goes as follows, you're given a list of three names and you must Marry one, Kill one, and-- use your imagination for the F ;-). Oh My Gosh. This is the most hilarious game to play when you're tired... and not tired... it's really just the best all the time. We started with celebrities then moved to people on campus, but we agreed to not use anyone in our group of friends... that didn't work out so we said that we couldn't use anyone present. It was a hoot! (PS- now we play it with everything you can think of, we have perverted the game so much from it's original intent. For example: "A bowl of Lucky Charms, A great quality lead pencil, and an empty plastic cup. MFK.") We stayed in there playing MFK until the weird security guy came and told us it was time to go.

Monday morning Kelly, Brandon, and I went to breakfast then chapel and we all had classes after that so we split up, but I felt like it was a really good bonding experience for us. I'm very happy about it! Then Monday night I died when I got my flipping Astronomy test back. Eek. Not the grade I wanted. AND I MISSED THE LAST TWO FOR NO REASON! We used a scan-tron for the multiple choice and true & false questions... There was not a question number 38 at all on the test and I didn't skip that bubble so I had answers to 39 and 40 in the spots for 38 and 39. UGH! I could be all, "It's not my fault!" but I should have been paying closer attention to the fact that apparently the #38 didn't freaking exist.

Okay there's way more, but I'm getting tired and I really want to read... and you probably want me to stop rambling about my pointless life. Have a great day!

Today's favorite is not exactly a video, but it's SO funny. It's a paper called "Plains, Trains, and Plantains: The Story of Oedipus" Guys, this is NOT a joke. Again, I'm sorry if you're offended by language, but this is ridiculous... Someone actually turned this in for a college class. Oh man, there are 7 pages to it, and you really have to read it AND the comments from the teacher. Classic.

The Kid From Lit

Today Katie, Elyson, and I walked over to Lit in Society like we do every Monday and Wenesday, and we yelled at John Dolence and Caleb on the way to the Strand building just like we do every Monday and Wednesday, and we went in the same exact door that we enter the building through every single Monday and Wednesday, but alas! UNLIKE every other Monday and Wednesday, the mysterious cute kid was standing just inside the door in the half-hallway outside of the classroom.

Elyson decided that it would behoove her to just go on into the classroom anyway. (who knows why the kid was standing out there...) As chance would have it, the cute kid was standing outside the room for a reason: there were some residual students in the room from the class before. We were cracking up at Elyson's barging in and this sparked a bit of dialogue with the cute kid! YAY! Guess what?! He has really pretty eyes! I could never tell that from the side view that I always have, but today I discovered that his eyes are a gorgeous blue. Hoorah!

Okay, I am excited that we finally talked, but I don't want anyone out there to think that I'm like, legit in like with this kid... (btw, his name's Mike.) I mean, I know absolutely nothing about him. Katie and I have this joke that he's probably a junior in high school doing post secondary stuff because his PHIZ info is scanty to say the least. =/ It really doesn't bug me though. It's fun to joke about and talk to Magical Michelle about. Oh man, I love that girl...

No favorites today obviously. I'm in a funk. It deals with my Celebration post... I'm being attacked again, pretty much. Boo that.

Chicken Strips with a Side of Blueberry Pancakes

Friday nights here at Malone are IHOP nights... coincidentally so are Saturday nights, but the following story happened on a Friday. Kelly, Amanda, Seth, Paul Traxler, and I were at our friendly neighborhood IHOP on Friday and something magical happened. I was facing a massive dilemma... I couldn't decide between my two favorite menu items: blueberry pancakes (oh baby) and chicken strips (a classic!). Our waitress, Audra, made "THE" Suggestion...

"How about you get the chicken strips and I substitute the french fries for blueberry pancakes?"
"WHAT?! You can DO that?!"
"Sure, I can switch out a potato for batter any day!"

I love you Audra... Anyway, I OF COURSE took her up on that deal and there was only like a 30 cent difference in price. It was probably the best meal I've ever had at a restaurant. =] Mmm...

Forgotten Favorites

I forgot how much I love some things... Old school FM Static, A Goofy Movie and the songs from it, the song "Breakfast at Tiffany's", and of course Jon Lajoie. How can we forget these things?

"Stand Out" from A Goofy Movie (This is the full version, I posted a movie clip on my facebook)
"Breakfast at Tiffany's" by Deep Blue Something
"Definitely Maybe"
"Something to Believe In"
"The Notion"
"Hold Me Twice"
"Three Days Later" (All of these from FM Static's first CD "What Are You Waiting For")
"Show Me Your Genitals"
"Pedophile Beards"
"Bootlegs and B-Sides" (All by Jon Lajoie, PS-don't watch 'em if you are offended easily =/)

Celebration to End All Celebrations (but hopefully not)

For those of you readers who don't attend Malone, you need to be aware that Celebration is a semi-weekly student led worship service held on Thursday nights. Tonight was one of those glorious Thursdays...

Corey, the speaker for tonight, talked about a lot of different things and mostly it felt like he was speaking directly to me (haha i know he wasn't). In case you don't remember from my post entitled "Mein Kampf," I have been struggling a lot with myself lately. Remember I said that I have a difficult time making guy friends because I'm not pretty? Well, tonight I realized that's poppycock and bolderdash... my weakness is my view of myself. THAT's what keeps me from feeling new friendships. It's not that they haven't formed, it's that I've been numb to them because I can't see beyond my own insecurities and feelings of loneliness.

I have been feeling so alone recently and I've been jealous of those who have been spending time with my friends when I can't be there. Oh man, that's so selfish. I have it engrained in my head that I'm not lovable... I neither deserve to be loved nor am I capable of being loved. Tonight at Celebration I finally felt like God was saying not to feel alone anymore, that He's def there for me always. I knew this in my head, but not my heart... I think it finally reached my heart. I'm not saying that it's going to be easy changing my mind about myself, but I know it needs to be done or else I'm telling God that He doesn't love me well enough. Please keep me in your prayers as I deal with this change of heart. Thanks. =]

Favorites:
Brian "Head" Welch of Korn gives his testimony
"In Crist Alone" by Travis Cottrell-- my favorite version EVER
"Marvelous Light" by Charlie Hall-- that's where it's at fo sho

My Mitchell Davis Blog

Don't get excited, Kelly, this is only titled "Mitchell Davis" because I think I have the same disorder that he does... He always says that he thinks of like thousands of ideas for videos and doesn't write them down and then totally blanks out when it comes time to actually make his videos. I have that but only the blog version.

I can say what it was that I wanted to blog about, but I have no actual substance to back up the topics:
-The cute kid from lit... mhmm. ;-)
-I am in love with doodling
-Intramural basketball has been so much fun to watch even though none of my boys have won yet
-Valentine's Day... 'nuff said. ugh.
-Overly-emotional again, go figure
-I'm depressed that Davis Tennant is leaving Dr. Who =/
-Broke the library (haha okay there is actually a really dumb story behind this one)

I don't know guys, I think I just need some time before I can start good stories again. Sorry for my lackluster blog-formance.

Today's faves: "Meezy" and "North to Alaska" by Mitchell Davis. So good. (Heck, I did use him for the title and I am a tad in love with him...)

Ripped Like Arnold Schwarzenegger

So i ripped three BA CDs from my friend Treg last night... Bullet for My Valentine, Rise Against, and Five Finger Death Punch. Woot! i can't wait to listen to them all! i'm going to work today to fill in for a friend; i'm not sure how i feel about it though. i mean, i love my job, but i really don't want to work on weekends and especially this weekend... little sibs!!! =/ ugh. i don't know. i guess i'm in weird funk. boo that.

Little Sibs

This weekend at Malone is Little Sibs weekend, right? For those who are bad with context clues, you bring your little sibs out here to sleep over and there are all these organized activities and other shenanigans and whatnot and it sounds like it'll be so much fun... WELL, I am blessed to have a wonderful older brother, but there are no little siblings to my name. Originally I had planned on having my birthday buddy (3 years younger exactly)/ adopted little sis come out here. We have been so stoked about this for like a year, but as it turns out, my baller of a "little sis" is coaching Heartland's Cub Club basketball team on Saturday and can't come out. GAAAAAAY! Man, I'm super bummed. Oh well, life goes on right?

Favorite: This is pretty mush THE most BA fan made trailor I have ever seen for a movie. The trailor is for 300 and is set to the song "Game On" by Disciple. It makes me want to punch someone square in the face when I watch it... or go watch 300. Either one, really.

Mein Kampf

I should clarify... I'm not referring to the book Mein Kampf in this post because I've never read that, though it's on my life long reading list, but what I AM referring to is my current struggle in life, which is that I don't fit the traditional standard of beauty and that makes me feel so left out sometimes. I KNOW that at least one person reading this relates to the feelings that I'm talking about, but I can only speak for myself here.

Sometimes I put myself in situations where I know I'll feel inferior but I've become almost accustomed to it by now. I've acquired an ability to somehow temporarily overlook the fact that all the people around me are beautiful when I'm hanging out with my friends, but then I get back to my dorm and it's like, "Crap man, that sucked." It's not that I don't have fun, it just that when I think about all the people I was with I feel like I probably shouldn't have been there because I would have ruined the photo op. I love my friends. I love them more than I know how to express. I know that they don't even realize that I feel this way because I'm great at paining on a smile. (Actually I find that recently I've been getting worse and worse with hiding my feelings on the subject...) It's really hard, though, when you hang out in a small group and the only attention you get from guys is every once in a while when someone needs to know who this actor is or what band wrote that song. First of all, I want to clarify that I don't want constant attention, but having your existance acknowledged is nice; second, I exaggerated that example a little bit to make my point. I'm not after anyone and I'm not a flirt, but it just shows that you have to be beautiful to get attention.

A lot of times I feel like I don't even exist when some of my friends are around. That's a terrible feeling and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. I really struggle to love myself and it's even harder when I feel like I can't compare in any way other than the fact that I'm a flipping huge nerd and have really weird interests that guys can relate to. It goes back to the whole "friend zone" phenomenon but this is way worse. I really feel like a lot of the guys in my life won't even have me as a friend because I'm not that attractive. I'm probably sounding like a bitter man-hater, but I promise you I'm not. I wish you could see the way it all goes down, then you'd understand. Seth Grubaugh and Aaron Shields have been two of my very best friends for the past six years of my life, but let me tell you that in general, guys here at school are not like them. They don't take the time to get to know you if you aren't pretty enough. They don't pursue a friendship if you're less than gorgeous and that sucks real bad.

I don't know why this has been bugging me so much lately but it really has been. I didn't write this for pity purposes or to have responses like, "oh noooo, you're sooooo pretty..." or any of that bull crap, I just needed to get it off my chest. Believe me, I could keep going, but I won't.


"Unpretty" by TLC

Philosophy and Basketball

One of my BFFs, Katie, and I decided that since we were watching a movie in philosophy today, we were going to treat ourselves to smoothies from Regula Cafe that are so scrumtrulescent you can barely move. She got peach mango and I got raspberry... both with a crap ton of whipped cream. Woot WOOT!

ANYway, she and I ended up getting to class about 15 minutes early which was cool because we had time to chat it up with some other early arrivals. So roughly ten minutes before class my friend Paul walks into the room and for no apparent reason other than that he's Paul, he yells "Screw the PO PO!" and knocks over a desk. He started busting up laughing and so did the rest of us because this dramatic act of civil disobedience was all an accident... I mean, he meant to say "screw the po po" (still for an unknown reason) but the desk thing was a total accident just with really funny timing.

9:00 tonight was the first intramural boys basketball game of the season! Ther were two games at 9 and two at 10... There are two teams that have "my boys" on them and luckily they weren't opposing each other though they both played tonight. Sadly, both my teams lost but they were great games. Our group of fans is TOTALLY making t-shirts. Get this: both of the teams use the color purple! (One is purple and black, the other is purple and orange... our shirts will be purple if you didn't already guess!) =]

I just realized that I haven't been including videos again... oops. So here are three goodies:
My friend Mike and some of his buddies made videos for two classic Journey songs, "Ask the Lonely" and "Stone in Love". They are really funny and somehow have generated a crap load of views for being a silly fun thing to do... Whatever, more power to you, guys!

Lastly, This is a great song by the Band Bedouin Soundclash... It's called "When the Night Feels My Song". Catchy and beautiful, it reminds me of the summer. =]

The Role of Leadership: To Whom Does It Belong?

As I was contemplating those flipping rolly maps in history I got kinda distracted from both the lecture AND the map situation... I started thinking about relationships and where the role of leadership fits.

Guys are supposed to be the head of the relationship; the leaders in every way. Women are supposed to be the nurturing love and support for their male counterpart. This is the Biblical way that God established the dynamic of relationships. So I was thinking about special scenarios and how they would affect this dynamic aversely and here's what I came up with:

-Girls should not be doormats. Easy enough, I know. I'm not a feminist or anything but I think that some guys could get carried away in that position of leadership and take for granted the fact that they have a good woman right next to them who is willing to fulfill her role as supporter.
- Girls should NOT have to be the one in charge. It is neither our responsibility nor our strength to be the leader, spiritual or otherwise, in the relationship. It's not fair to make us the head of the relationship; just get over it, take responsibility, and be the leader you were meant to be.

After I thought that stuff, I was like, "Self, what if there's this girl who has been single for a long time and her father was not an adequate leader in her life? What is she to do? She's learned to motivate herself and be totally independent... HOW on EARTH is she supposed to let the man come in and take control?" Honestly, I stumped myself with this one. I know it has to be sooo hard, but giving up the reins so to speak is something that we just have GOT to do.

Ladies reading this, prepare yourself to be led and directed in the way you should go. Encourage him and support him in all he does. Above all, let him be the man.

Guys, take it easy on your girl if she has a hard time letting go of control... it's way harder than it seems. Be a bold leader and don't be afraid to correct her when she's wrong, but make sure you are correcting in love and not out of selfish ambition. Cherish her.

Frustrations

I forgot to include yesterday the story of how I slipped on the ice on my way to work. Oh man, it was so funny! There was simply no way to avoid it though... I mean, there are random HUGE patches of ice covering the ground here at Malone. I saw like 3 people biff it yesterday, and a ton that slipped without falling, so I'm not the only tard with traction problems. I dunno, it's just a tad frustrating when there is all this dry ground and then all of a sudden a huge, unpassable expanse of ice and snow. Who does that?! Who PUT THAT THERE?!

Today I was sitting in history class and we were talking about slave export routes when Dr. J thought it would be beneficial if we saw the routes on one of the big rolly maps at the side of the classroom... let me just say, that was a terrible idea. I've always hated those rolly maps; they only cause heartache and trouble for everyone! The map we were supposed to be looking at was falling off because the top map that Dr. J had rolled was coming all undone and whatnot. Ugh. Those oversized maps are irritating.

Somethign else that irks me about college is that none of my professors thus far have taken time to erase the white board completely when they are done using it. I mean, come on, the little marks stay up there and drive me absolutely insane. You can't even tell me that they don't bug you too...

Tired as HECK

So there I was in bed this morning knowing full well that I had one more hour of blissful sleep before I had to get up to start my day when IT happened. My cell phone rang and like a total idiot I answered. On the other line was my friend Bob who, a few seconds into the exchange, made the astute observation that I sounded like I just woke up. "Yeah Bob," I replied, "I just woke up." He said, "Okay never mind." And HERE was my second fatal mistake: I responded, "No, it's okay, what do you need?" What a moron I am. Ugh. He needed to interview me for a speech he had to present at 11 this morning and wanted to meet me in the cafeteria in 10 minutes. *insert small whimper here.* So I rolled out of bed, got dressed, and brushed my teeth all begrudgingly. I was so ticked, he stole an HOUR of sleep! ANYway, I went to the cafeteria and we had our talk then I headed back to my room without any significant time to do anything but wait until chapel. (BTW, chapel today is where my favorite video comes from, it's so funny!)

After chapel I had to give a speech about Bob (yes, the very same one who stole my hour!!!) and it went really well even though I was nervous as crap. Then I went to lunch and had some beef fajita thing that was really tasty but would have been infinitely better with sour cream. Anyway, I digress... So I came back to my room with every intention to read for a bit then take a nap because my Monday evenings are absolutely ridiculous. Weeeelllllll, I got a little carried away with my book and ended up not having time to take a sufficient nap. Oops. I headed to Lit and tried not to fall asleep while our Bob Ross-look a like professor talked about poetry. Whe we were finally granted freedom, I mean, dismissed, I went to chat up Kelly for a few minutes before work.

The library was not helpful in my attempt at staying awake because it was really cozy warm in there and my supervisors kept talking about how it had been making them tired all day. Nice. So I got off work at 5:30 and was dreading my 6 pm astronomy class simply because I sit in the front and it would be very difficult to hide drooping eyelids... Somehow I made it through, but now I'm hungry due to lack of dinner and I'm trying to muster the energy to write a history paper. Blah.

All in all, I'd say it was a good day. Hahahaha. =]

Here's the video from chapel. It's possibly the number one reason why people hate Christians, and I think it's absolutely hilarious. Just because we are true to our God does NOT mean that life is actually like this for us. How hokey.

Just One of Those Days

Hmmmm, today was one of those days where I ate and ate and ate even though I wasn't hungry. I could blame the Super Bowl, but that would be unfair since the bulk of my eating has occurred before the actual game. My stomach hurts. How sucky.

I hate writing speeches. I have to give a stinkin' speech tomorrow and I haven't written it yet. Booo communications. How sucky.

My brother's friend Dan is staying at my house again. I flipping love Dan. He's so funny and laid back. Spending time with him and my brother is so much fun and I got to do that forever this weekend. I always miss my brother so much when I get back to school. I mean, typically I enjoy being at school more than being home, but I really miss my brother and Dan. How sucky.

Heartland won it's homecoming game by a landslide. How GLORIOUS!

Some of my best friends from Malone came to my house this weekend!! =] How wonderful!

I have nothing really to blog about right now... OH! We discovered that the movie Out Cold is pretty much an updated version of Casablanca. That was a weird discovery.


Alrighty... today's favorite video is going to be a hilarious video of an absolutely precious little girl.

HCS is whaaaaaaaat?! REDHOT!

Tomorrow is my high school's homecoming basketball game. Most people would be all, "Whateveeeer," but not I. I have more Purple Pride than I have room for. I have GRATUITOUS AMOUNTS OF SCHOOL SPIRIT. But seriously though. I love Heartland so much it's unreal and I'm so beyond stoked to be going to the homecoming game. It'll take everything in my power to not jump down on the court and bust out in a cheer. Oohhh the glory days of varsity cheerleading... soooo good. And no, I was NOT "that cheerleader," thank you very much. =]

Also for this momentous event, Ricki, Amanda and myself are bringing home our core group of friends because everyone is DYING to finally see the HCS that we always talk about. haha, I know I at least speak for me and Ricki when I say that we are in love with the place. I'm so excited. Aaron Zorn is staying at my house and that should be really fun... him and my brother already love each other because there was one time when I was chatting online with Zorn and I had to make these brownies so I left him to talk to my brother. It was love at first line of type. This is gonna be a great weekend.

I just realized that in my rapidfire blogging I've been forgetting the faves... so I'll include 4 to make up for lost time.

First one is going to be "Hit in the USA" by Beat Crusaders.
Second will be another one by Beat Crusaders, "Tonight Tonight Tonight"
*Those two were both actually courtesy of Aaron Zorn*
Third isssss.... a surprise. =]
And lastly I leave you with The Bible in a Minute by Barats and Bereta. Christian or not, you'll enjoy this I think.

Window

My roomie's sister Wendy lives in the dorm room two doors down from us and tonight someone thought it would be hilarious to launch a snowball at their window at the crack of 11:45 pm... Guess what?! The window broke. Our RA was out cold. The creepy Campus Security guys came. There was much laughter and bonding amongst the girls on our floor. In fact, here I sit in the lounge outside of my room with two of the lovely ladies... one that I've hardly even seen before. Turns out she has an awesome sense of humor. Luckily, she's my neighbor so I can start seeing her more often! Woot!

PS- Everyone is fine, it was more funny than anything.

The World History Debacle

So today in history we were discussing Calvinism and Armenianism... not a problem for most people, but for me it was a huge deal. See, I have some emotional ties to this debate. Arg. Last year, my friend Joseph and I went on a search for answers regarding this particular subject and after much diving into Scripture and reading up on the differing theologies, we both came to the conclusion that even though we sort of hate the implications, we think that Calvinism is more Biblically based. (Don't hate on me for this, I do not condemn those that follow the Armenian tradition and I hope you won't comndemn me.)

ANYway, so as we were comparing the different viewpoints, one of my closer friends apparently was making some disgusted face when discussing the predestination aspect of Calvinism. He said with such disdain, "That is NOT Biblical." Okay, perhaps I have no real right to get upset about that but after last year's journey for knowledge, I was fuming at that comment. I don't mind talking about it, but it's the fact that I can nearly guarantee that he's never looked into the subject in the detail that I've looked into it (not that i'm like, "oooh cuz i'm that cool" but it's just fuel for the flame) and he speaks with SUCH authority about it! I don't know... beyond my frustration with what he said, also pile on the fact that about 90% of my classmates and my prof are of the Armenian belief... no big deal, but it's weird to feel virtually no encouragement. I know that the word "persecution" is pretty harsh, but I felt persecuted for lack of a better word. I was just frustrated because I felt ashamed for the beliefs that I felt convicted to put stock in. If Dr. J would have asked us to raise our hands for which belief we tend to side with, I honestly don't think I would have raised my hand at all.

That class sucked today.

Ogres Are Like Onions

I also posted this on my facebook today too...

hmmm, ogres are like onions, or at least that's what shrek said...
i feel like i am likewise an onion; layer after layer after layer. my main problem is that i don't know what my core is. i'm not talking spiritually here, because i KNOW that my spiritual onion core is Jesus, i mean my personality core. what am i? i have no base, no bottom layer... i only have more and more layers of contradicting personality traits. i don't know what i am.

Super Massive Black Snow Storm

Today was a momentous day, a day to be remembered... Not only was it the first snow day of the year for Malone, but it was the whole freshman class's first COLLEGE SNOW DAY! Honestly, my mind has been significantly blown today. Here's how it was discovered that classes were canceled (you might want to get a snack before I start because it's a tale of love, lust, treachery, deceit, faith, and hot chocolate):

I woke up at 7:45 this morning to the sounds of snow-blowers, contrary to the sound of people in out in the hallway like usual. My first thought was "SNOW DAY!" but I decided not to jump the gun and get my hopes up. I reached for my laptop and logged on. As I was directing my Mozilla to Malone's homepage I couldn't help but say to myself, "You are just setting yourself up for disappointment. Put the computer away and go take your dang shower." Before I had the chance to shut my laptop the website showed up and had the glorious red notice running across the top: "ALL DAY CLASSES HAVE BEEN CANCELED." Apparently my beautiful roommate heard me typing on my keyboard and knew exactly what I was doing so she waited in silence to hear the verdict... "oh. My. GOSH!" was all I could manage to say. She started freaking out and I was thrusting my computer up at her face so she could read the banner for herself when we both let out a victorious cry. We hopped out of bed and unplugged my Lappy 486 and headed for Amanda and Kelly's room at the polar opposite end of our hall. Before we got there, we did a few triumphant laps of the hallway and showed our neighbor Bethany the notice.

When we finally got to Amanda and Kelly's, Amanda was already sitting up and upon our walking in said, "I already know but Kelly doesn't." Ricki and I looked down to see Kelly still in a deep slumber... haha, not for much longer. We woke her up (very much to her immediate chagrin) and when she saw the glorious red strip across the top of my computer's screen her eyes instantly became saucers. She started flipping out right along with us. Ricki and I then took our merry stroll back down the stretch of hall back to our room to slip back into blissful snow day sleep. About 2 hours later I wake up to Amanda standing in our room eating a bowl of cereal and watching us sleep. What a freakin' creepster. It's okay though because I love her so much! =]

Aaron Zorn (http://zornonthecob.blogspot.com) called me at like noonish and wanted to go to lunch and then go sledding on the massive hill that's behind the cafeteria... we were SO game for that. Everyone got showered and ready for lunch where we met our friend Jared's little brother, Isaac; he seemed pretty BA, but I might be biased because he just had to put up with our shenanigans to earn that status... which he did. Then when we went to go sledding, it was FREEZING as heck with the wind whipping around at the top of the hill. I was done after going down one time... call me pansy, I don't care. Then I wen with Aaron Zorn to get some hot chocolate and have a lil chat which was cool because we never really get to just talk. Plus the hot chocolate was scrumptious. =] We all kind of sat around in Myers loung for awhile and then headed to dinner where nothing terribly exciting happened. After dinner I headed over to Zorn's room to watch Pulp Fiction and hang out... It was really fun.

All in all, I'd say today was a great day and I could most definitely get used to college snow days.

Today's favorite is going to be "Challengers" by The New Pornographers. This band is fronted by the extrodinarily talented Neko Case. Love this song and the video is beautiful too... weird, but really pretty. Enjoy!

Expanding Our Musical Horizons

Everett Cattell Library. I work there. It's a blast and I adore the people I work with. Tuesdays last semester I worked from 5-6 pm and at first it was terrifying... I mean here was the situation: I wasn't even fully trained yet and I was scheduled with this kid Ian, a junior, who I assumed I had nothing in common with, then at 5:30 Ian left and I was completely alone until 6. (Okay, now that I type it, it doesn't seem so bad, but trust me, I was intimidated.)

The second Tuesday of this schedule, my dearest friends Kelly, Ricki, and Amanda came to the library at 5:40 and said that they not only were going to stay there with me until my shift ended, but also that they had a special secret surprise for me waiting back in my dorm room... I love those girls. Can I just say how much it meant to me that they did that? They knew that I dreaded this time more than anything else in life, so they decided to make it a little better for me. Anyway, so I get off work and they lead me back to my dorm and lo and behold, they smuggled a cup of ice cream out of the cafeteria for me! What a delicious surprise it was indeed. =] You can see that they didn't hold back on the sprinkles in the picture there... (This image courtesy of Kelly who documented the tasty, day brightening treat.)

So, what became of my Tuesdays, you ask? (Yes, I realize that you probably didn't ask, but hey, humor me...) Since I know that prayer is a powerful thing, I decided that if I wanted things to get less intimidating with Ian I would pray for him. That's right Ian, if you're reading this, I prayed for you a lot. I asked God to use the time we had together to foster a friendship or even just open up an opportunity to get to know someone new. After a few weeks of weird silence between Ian and me, it was revealed that it was hopeless for us to try to agree on who the funnier comedian was, BUT we did share a relatively open mind about music! Badda bing, Badda boom, common ground. What started out as trying to share some favorite songs with each other, soon turned into weekly "assignments" of sorts... well, mine were usually premeditated lists trying to stump him. HE KNOWS EVERYTHING! Anywho, the relationship was developed and someone came in to start supervising at 5:30 so I wasn't completely alone. My Tuesdays turned out awesome after all.

This semester I don't have any shifts with Ian and suffice it to say that I'm really missing his weird taste in music already.

Today's favorite is going to be one of Ian's suggestions from the good ol' days... "Six Underground" by Sneaker Pimps. Thanks, Ian!

I Have One Word For You: Welcome to America

All right, this is my blog and frankly, it'll be so scrumtrulescent you'll barely be able to move. Just kidding (kind of). But seriously, lately there has been a huge wave of people at my school creating and updating blogs out the wazoo so I was like, "Hey! I have thoughts!" And also my friend Aaron bugged me for a few seconds about starting a blog and that was enough to put me over the edge to do it!

So my first entry is just me saying Helllllllloooooooo, World! I think that since i have somewhere in the neighborhood of 340 favorites on YouTube, I'll probably include one of my favorites per entry... that would be fun. A lot of them are songs, so that's something to look forward to. I mean, I'm not cool enough to have pictures for everything like one of my best friends, Kelly, has in her blog (http://kellysthoughtsgovkellysthoughts.blogspot.com/) so all of you throngs of readers (haha, yeah right) will have to settle for videos of things that I like. Ha.

I don't even know what the heck this is even going to be about. My best guess is that I'll talk about weird things that happen in my days, my friends, things that bug me, politics, religion, music, definitely movies, and even though I graduated and moved on to college at Malone University, I'll probably reference my high school, Heartland, a lot because it was a ginormous part of my life.

Oh, and PS- My blog title "Guten Morgen and Bagels" comes from a girl that is very near and dear to my heart... her name is Abby and she's a little crazy in the brain. This particular entry's title comes from something one of my best friends said to my roommate at lunch a few days ago. Ricki, my roomie, was eating something with chopsticks and John asked her why. Ricki responded, "Because I love chopsticks and they use them in China!" John proceeded to say, "You know what? I have one word for you... WELCOME TO AMERICA!" And basically EVERYTHING is funnier when John Dolence says it.

My favorite for the day is........ "Norwegian Cowbell" by Paul Gilbert. Give it a listen, I promise it's awesome!