Aww Crap.

It happened again. I know there was something significant to blog about but I really can't remember what it was... Shoot. Give me a sec....

OH YEAH! Okay so this week was so BIPOLAR it hurt. Sunday, awesome day of hanging out and merriment. Intramurals out the wazoo were going on Sunday and we all know how much I live for those basketball games. So after the games were over, Ricki, Amanda, Brandon, and I went to McDonald's for some sustenance (before I continue, you should know that Ricki was driving a Mustang) and on the way there some putzy kids in the lane next to us revved their engine while we were at a stop light... The most epic street race ever ensued and even though it was AWESOME to SMOKE those clowns, we were right in the flipping middle of Canton. In retrospect it probably wasn't the brightest idea ever, but it was so much fun.

We got our food and headed back to campus to sit by the lit fireplace in the lounge of the girls' dorms and eat & fellowship. After a bit, Amanda left and John and Kelly came over to hang with us until midnight when the guys get kicked out. It was so fun having that time with all of them... I know it sounds so lame probably, but I really do cherish any quality time that I get to spend with my friends when we aren't stressed about classes, work, "Frickin Rachel," the upcoming track meet, or clinicals. So anyway, when 12 rolled around we all were like, "This is gay. We still want to hang out." So to remedy this situation, we hit up The Barn which is open until 4am for everyone. (Our friend Steve had his hammock strung up in the Barn... it was really fun to play around on. This has nothing to do with the rest of the story, it's just a fun fact.)

For you non-Maloners, there's this breed of people we like to refer to as "The Barneys." They are the ones who are ALWAYS at the barn, doing homework, hanging out, eating, sleeping, whatever... They leave at 4 when it closes and come back two hours later when it re-opens; they just love the barn. (*cough* Aaron Zorn *cough*) We wereshocked when we went to the Barn that Sunday evening that the regular Barney crowd wasn't there!!! After a mere hour and a half, Kelly, Ricki, Brandon, and I were the ONLY FOUR people in there! Seriously, guys, this DOESN'T happen. Man, we were living it up, too. Ricki and me were running around like crazy people and being so stupid. She jumped off the balcony to the main floor... Terrifying but awesome. At about 3 ish we started playing this game called MFK. (Thank you Brandon!) The game goes as follows, you're given a list of three names and you must Marry one, Kill one, and-- use your imagination for the F ;-). Oh My Gosh. This is the most hilarious game to play when you're tired... and not tired... it's really just the best all the time. We started with celebrities then moved to people on campus, but we agreed to not use anyone in our group of friends... that didn't work out so we said that we couldn't use anyone present. It was a hoot! (PS- now we play it with everything you can think of, we have perverted the game so much from it's original intent. For example: "A bowl of Lucky Charms, A great quality lead pencil, and an empty plastic cup. MFK.") We stayed in there playing MFK until the weird security guy came and told us it was time to go.

Monday morning Kelly, Brandon, and I went to breakfast then chapel and we all had classes after that so we split up, but I felt like it was a really good bonding experience for us. I'm very happy about it! Then Monday night I died when I got my flipping Astronomy test back. Eek. Not the grade I wanted. AND I MISSED THE LAST TWO FOR NO REASON! We used a scan-tron for the multiple choice and true & false questions... There was not a question number 38 at all on the test and I didn't skip that bubble so I had answers to 39 and 40 in the spots for 38 and 39. UGH! I could be all, "It's not my fault!" but I should have been paying closer attention to the fact that apparently the #38 didn't freaking exist.

Okay there's way more, but I'm getting tired and I really want to read... and you probably want me to stop rambling about my pointless life. Have a great day!

Today's favorite is not exactly a video, but it's SO funny. It's a paper called "Plains, Trains, and Plantains: The Story of Oedipus" Guys, this is NOT a joke. Again, I'm sorry if you're offended by language, but this is ridiculous... Someone actually turned this in for a college class. Oh man, there are 7 pages to it, and you really have to read it AND the comments from the teacher. Classic.

The Kid From Lit

Today Katie, Elyson, and I walked over to Lit in Society like we do every Monday and Wenesday, and we yelled at John Dolence and Caleb on the way to the Strand building just like we do every Monday and Wednesday, and we went in the same exact door that we enter the building through every single Monday and Wednesday, but alas! UNLIKE every other Monday and Wednesday, the mysterious cute kid was standing just inside the door in the half-hallway outside of the classroom.

Elyson decided that it would behoove her to just go on into the classroom anyway. (who knows why the kid was standing out there...) As chance would have it, the cute kid was standing outside the room for a reason: there were some residual students in the room from the class before. We were cracking up at Elyson's barging in and this sparked a bit of dialogue with the cute kid! YAY! Guess what?! He has really pretty eyes! I could never tell that from the side view that I always have, but today I discovered that his eyes are a gorgeous blue. Hoorah!

Okay, I am excited that we finally talked, but I don't want anyone out there to think that I'm like, legit in like with this kid... (btw, his name's Mike.) I mean, I know absolutely nothing about him. Katie and I have this joke that he's probably a junior in high school doing post secondary stuff because his PHIZ info is scanty to say the least. =/ It really doesn't bug me though. It's fun to joke about and talk to Magical Michelle about. Oh man, I love that girl...

No favorites today obviously. I'm in a funk. It deals with my Celebration post... I'm being attacked again, pretty much. Boo that.

Chicken Strips with a Side of Blueberry Pancakes

Friday nights here at Malone are IHOP nights... coincidentally so are Saturday nights, but the following story happened on a Friday. Kelly, Amanda, Seth, Paul Traxler, and I were at our friendly neighborhood IHOP on Friday and something magical happened. I was facing a massive dilemma... I couldn't decide between my two favorite menu items: blueberry pancakes (oh baby) and chicken strips (a classic!). Our waitress, Audra, made "THE" Suggestion...

"How about you get the chicken strips and I substitute the french fries for blueberry pancakes?"
"WHAT?! You can DO that?!"
"Sure, I can switch out a potato for batter any day!"

I love you Audra... Anyway, I OF COURSE took her up on that deal and there was only like a 30 cent difference in price. It was probably the best meal I've ever had at a restaurant. =] Mmm...

Forgotten Favorites

I forgot how much I love some things... Old school FM Static, A Goofy Movie and the songs from it, the song "Breakfast at Tiffany's", and of course Jon Lajoie. How can we forget these things?

"Stand Out" from A Goofy Movie (This is the full version, I posted a movie clip on my facebook)
"Breakfast at Tiffany's" by Deep Blue Something
"Definitely Maybe"
"Something to Believe In"
"The Notion"
"Hold Me Twice"
"Three Days Later" (All of these from FM Static's first CD "What Are You Waiting For")
"Show Me Your Genitals"
"Pedophile Beards"
"Bootlegs and B-Sides" (All by Jon Lajoie, PS-don't watch 'em if you are offended easily =/)

Celebration to End All Celebrations (but hopefully not)

For those of you readers who don't attend Malone, you need to be aware that Celebration is a semi-weekly student led worship service held on Thursday nights. Tonight was one of those glorious Thursdays...

Corey, the speaker for tonight, talked about a lot of different things and mostly it felt like he was speaking directly to me (haha i know he wasn't). In case you don't remember from my post entitled "Mein Kampf," I have been struggling a lot with myself lately. Remember I said that I have a difficult time making guy friends because I'm not pretty? Well, tonight I realized that's poppycock and bolderdash... my weakness is my view of myself. THAT's what keeps me from feeling new friendships. It's not that they haven't formed, it's that I've been numb to them because I can't see beyond my own insecurities and feelings of loneliness.

I have been feeling so alone recently and I've been jealous of those who have been spending time with my friends when I can't be there. Oh man, that's so selfish. I have it engrained in my head that I'm not lovable... I neither deserve to be loved nor am I capable of being loved. Tonight at Celebration I finally felt like God was saying not to feel alone anymore, that He's def there for me always. I knew this in my head, but not my heart... I think it finally reached my heart. I'm not saying that it's going to be easy changing my mind about myself, but I know it needs to be done or else I'm telling God that He doesn't love me well enough. Please keep me in your prayers as I deal with this change of heart. Thanks. =]

Favorites:
Brian "Head" Welch of Korn gives his testimony
"In Crist Alone" by Travis Cottrell-- my favorite version EVER
"Marvelous Light" by Charlie Hall-- that's where it's at fo sho

My Mitchell Davis Blog

Don't get excited, Kelly, this is only titled "Mitchell Davis" because I think I have the same disorder that he does... He always says that he thinks of like thousands of ideas for videos and doesn't write them down and then totally blanks out when it comes time to actually make his videos. I have that but only the blog version.

I can say what it was that I wanted to blog about, but I have no actual substance to back up the topics:
-The cute kid from lit... mhmm. ;-)
-I am in love with doodling
-Intramural basketball has been so much fun to watch even though none of my boys have won yet
-Valentine's Day... 'nuff said. ugh.
-Overly-emotional again, go figure
-I'm depressed that Davis Tennant is leaving Dr. Who =/
-Broke the library (haha okay there is actually a really dumb story behind this one)

I don't know guys, I think I just need some time before I can start good stories again. Sorry for my lackluster blog-formance.

Today's faves: "Meezy" and "North to Alaska" by Mitchell Davis. So good. (Heck, I did use him for the title and I am a tad in love with him...)

Ripped Like Arnold Schwarzenegger

So i ripped three BA CDs from my friend Treg last night... Bullet for My Valentine, Rise Against, and Five Finger Death Punch. Woot! i can't wait to listen to them all! i'm going to work today to fill in for a friend; i'm not sure how i feel about it though. i mean, i love my job, but i really don't want to work on weekends and especially this weekend... little sibs!!! =/ ugh. i don't know. i guess i'm in weird funk. boo that.

Little Sibs

This weekend at Malone is Little Sibs weekend, right? For those who are bad with context clues, you bring your little sibs out here to sleep over and there are all these organized activities and other shenanigans and whatnot and it sounds like it'll be so much fun... WELL, I am blessed to have a wonderful older brother, but there are no little siblings to my name. Originally I had planned on having my birthday buddy (3 years younger exactly)/ adopted little sis come out here. We have been so stoked about this for like a year, but as it turns out, my baller of a "little sis" is coaching Heartland's Cub Club basketball team on Saturday and can't come out. GAAAAAAY! Man, I'm super bummed. Oh well, life goes on right?

Favorite: This is pretty mush THE most BA fan made trailor I have ever seen for a movie. The trailor is for 300 and is set to the song "Game On" by Disciple. It makes me want to punch someone square in the face when I watch it... or go watch 300. Either one, really.

Mein Kampf

I should clarify... I'm not referring to the book Mein Kampf in this post because I've never read that, though it's on my life long reading list, but what I AM referring to is my current struggle in life, which is that I don't fit the traditional standard of beauty and that makes me feel so left out sometimes. I KNOW that at least one person reading this relates to the feelings that I'm talking about, but I can only speak for myself here.

Sometimes I put myself in situations where I know I'll feel inferior but I've become almost accustomed to it by now. I've acquired an ability to somehow temporarily overlook the fact that all the people around me are beautiful when I'm hanging out with my friends, but then I get back to my dorm and it's like, "Crap man, that sucked." It's not that I don't have fun, it just that when I think about all the people I was with I feel like I probably shouldn't have been there because I would have ruined the photo op. I love my friends. I love them more than I know how to express. I know that they don't even realize that I feel this way because I'm great at paining on a smile. (Actually I find that recently I've been getting worse and worse with hiding my feelings on the subject...) It's really hard, though, when you hang out in a small group and the only attention you get from guys is every once in a while when someone needs to know who this actor is or what band wrote that song. First of all, I want to clarify that I don't want constant attention, but having your existance acknowledged is nice; second, I exaggerated that example a little bit to make my point. I'm not after anyone and I'm not a flirt, but it just shows that you have to be beautiful to get attention.

A lot of times I feel like I don't even exist when some of my friends are around. That's a terrible feeling and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. I really struggle to love myself and it's even harder when I feel like I can't compare in any way other than the fact that I'm a flipping huge nerd and have really weird interests that guys can relate to. It goes back to the whole "friend zone" phenomenon but this is way worse. I really feel like a lot of the guys in my life won't even have me as a friend because I'm not that attractive. I'm probably sounding like a bitter man-hater, but I promise you I'm not. I wish you could see the way it all goes down, then you'd understand. Seth Grubaugh and Aaron Shields have been two of my very best friends for the past six years of my life, but let me tell you that in general, guys here at school are not like them. They don't take the time to get to know you if you aren't pretty enough. They don't pursue a friendship if you're less than gorgeous and that sucks real bad.

I don't know why this has been bugging me so much lately but it really has been. I didn't write this for pity purposes or to have responses like, "oh noooo, you're sooooo pretty..." or any of that bull crap, I just needed to get it off my chest. Believe me, I could keep going, but I won't.


"Unpretty" by TLC

Philosophy and Basketball

One of my BFFs, Katie, and I decided that since we were watching a movie in philosophy today, we were going to treat ourselves to smoothies from Regula Cafe that are so scrumtrulescent you can barely move. She got peach mango and I got raspberry... both with a crap ton of whipped cream. Woot WOOT!

ANYway, she and I ended up getting to class about 15 minutes early which was cool because we had time to chat it up with some other early arrivals. So roughly ten minutes before class my friend Paul walks into the room and for no apparent reason other than that he's Paul, he yells "Screw the PO PO!" and knocks over a desk. He started busting up laughing and so did the rest of us because this dramatic act of civil disobedience was all an accident... I mean, he meant to say "screw the po po" (still for an unknown reason) but the desk thing was a total accident just with really funny timing.

9:00 tonight was the first intramural boys basketball game of the season! Ther were two games at 9 and two at 10... There are two teams that have "my boys" on them and luckily they weren't opposing each other though they both played tonight. Sadly, both my teams lost but they were great games. Our group of fans is TOTALLY making t-shirts. Get this: both of the teams use the color purple! (One is purple and black, the other is purple and orange... our shirts will be purple if you didn't already guess!) =]

I just realized that I haven't been including videos again... oops. So here are three goodies:
My friend Mike and some of his buddies made videos for two classic Journey songs, "Ask the Lonely" and "Stone in Love". They are really funny and somehow have generated a crap load of views for being a silly fun thing to do... Whatever, more power to you, guys!

Lastly, This is a great song by the Band Bedouin Soundclash... It's called "When the Night Feels My Song". Catchy and beautiful, it reminds me of the summer. =]

The Role of Leadership: To Whom Does It Belong?

As I was contemplating those flipping rolly maps in history I got kinda distracted from both the lecture AND the map situation... I started thinking about relationships and where the role of leadership fits.

Guys are supposed to be the head of the relationship; the leaders in every way. Women are supposed to be the nurturing love and support for their male counterpart. This is the Biblical way that God established the dynamic of relationships. So I was thinking about special scenarios and how they would affect this dynamic aversely and here's what I came up with:

-Girls should not be doormats. Easy enough, I know. I'm not a feminist or anything but I think that some guys could get carried away in that position of leadership and take for granted the fact that they have a good woman right next to them who is willing to fulfill her role as supporter.
- Girls should NOT have to be the one in charge. It is neither our responsibility nor our strength to be the leader, spiritual or otherwise, in the relationship. It's not fair to make us the head of the relationship; just get over it, take responsibility, and be the leader you were meant to be.

After I thought that stuff, I was like, "Self, what if there's this girl who has been single for a long time and her father was not an adequate leader in her life? What is she to do? She's learned to motivate herself and be totally independent... HOW on EARTH is she supposed to let the man come in and take control?" Honestly, I stumped myself with this one. I know it has to be sooo hard, but giving up the reins so to speak is something that we just have GOT to do.

Ladies reading this, prepare yourself to be led and directed in the way you should go. Encourage him and support him in all he does. Above all, let him be the man.

Guys, take it easy on your girl if she has a hard time letting go of control... it's way harder than it seems. Be a bold leader and don't be afraid to correct her when she's wrong, but make sure you are correcting in love and not out of selfish ambition. Cherish her.

Frustrations

I forgot to include yesterday the story of how I slipped on the ice on my way to work. Oh man, it was so funny! There was simply no way to avoid it though... I mean, there are random HUGE patches of ice covering the ground here at Malone. I saw like 3 people biff it yesterday, and a ton that slipped without falling, so I'm not the only tard with traction problems. I dunno, it's just a tad frustrating when there is all this dry ground and then all of a sudden a huge, unpassable expanse of ice and snow. Who does that?! Who PUT THAT THERE?!

Today I was sitting in history class and we were talking about slave export routes when Dr. J thought it would be beneficial if we saw the routes on one of the big rolly maps at the side of the classroom... let me just say, that was a terrible idea. I've always hated those rolly maps; they only cause heartache and trouble for everyone! The map we were supposed to be looking at was falling off because the top map that Dr. J had rolled was coming all undone and whatnot. Ugh. Those oversized maps are irritating.

Somethign else that irks me about college is that none of my professors thus far have taken time to erase the white board completely when they are done using it. I mean, come on, the little marks stay up there and drive me absolutely insane. You can't even tell me that they don't bug you too...

Tired as HECK

So there I was in bed this morning knowing full well that I had one more hour of blissful sleep before I had to get up to start my day when IT happened. My cell phone rang and like a total idiot I answered. On the other line was my friend Bob who, a few seconds into the exchange, made the astute observation that I sounded like I just woke up. "Yeah Bob," I replied, "I just woke up." He said, "Okay never mind." And HERE was my second fatal mistake: I responded, "No, it's okay, what do you need?" What a moron I am. Ugh. He needed to interview me for a speech he had to present at 11 this morning and wanted to meet me in the cafeteria in 10 minutes. *insert small whimper here.* So I rolled out of bed, got dressed, and brushed my teeth all begrudgingly. I was so ticked, he stole an HOUR of sleep! ANYway, I went to the cafeteria and we had our talk then I headed back to my room without any significant time to do anything but wait until chapel. (BTW, chapel today is where my favorite video comes from, it's so funny!)

After chapel I had to give a speech about Bob (yes, the very same one who stole my hour!!!) and it went really well even though I was nervous as crap. Then I went to lunch and had some beef fajita thing that was really tasty but would have been infinitely better with sour cream. Anyway, I digress... So I came back to my room with every intention to read for a bit then take a nap because my Monday evenings are absolutely ridiculous. Weeeelllllll, I got a little carried away with my book and ended up not having time to take a sufficient nap. Oops. I headed to Lit and tried not to fall asleep while our Bob Ross-look a like professor talked about poetry. Whe we were finally granted freedom, I mean, dismissed, I went to chat up Kelly for a few minutes before work.

The library was not helpful in my attempt at staying awake because it was really cozy warm in there and my supervisors kept talking about how it had been making them tired all day. Nice. So I got off work at 5:30 and was dreading my 6 pm astronomy class simply because I sit in the front and it would be very difficult to hide drooping eyelids... Somehow I made it through, but now I'm hungry due to lack of dinner and I'm trying to muster the energy to write a history paper. Blah.

All in all, I'd say it was a good day. Hahahaha. =]

Here's the video from chapel. It's possibly the number one reason why people hate Christians, and I think it's absolutely hilarious. Just because we are true to our God does NOT mean that life is actually like this for us. How hokey.

Just One of Those Days

Hmmmm, today was one of those days where I ate and ate and ate even though I wasn't hungry. I could blame the Super Bowl, but that would be unfair since the bulk of my eating has occurred before the actual game. My stomach hurts. How sucky.

I hate writing speeches. I have to give a stinkin' speech tomorrow and I haven't written it yet. Booo communications. How sucky.

My brother's friend Dan is staying at my house again. I flipping love Dan. He's so funny and laid back. Spending time with him and my brother is so much fun and I got to do that forever this weekend. I always miss my brother so much when I get back to school. I mean, typically I enjoy being at school more than being home, but I really miss my brother and Dan. How sucky.

Heartland won it's homecoming game by a landslide. How GLORIOUS!

Some of my best friends from Malone came to my house this weekend!! =] How wonderful!

I have nothing really to blog about right now... OH! We discovered that the movie Out Cold is pretty much an updated version of Casablanca. That was a weird discovery.


Alrighty... today's favorite video is going to be a hilarious video of an absolutely precious little girl.